What he wouldn't do
by LadyShinigami12
Summary: Ronald would do anything to go on a group date-so when Will gives him overtime, he calls in the help of Alan and Eric to get Will together with Grell  but they only have a few hours to it.  Rated T for safety reasons.
1. The Plan

**A/N: Okay, this was more WillXGrell when I thought it up, but I just love Ronald so much, I spent most of the time with him messing up. I do have the other chapters written, but I'm going to wait a day to see if any reviews might make them better. Oh, and I don't own Kuroshitsuji or the musical. **

Ronald smiled as he sat down to drink his morning coffee. He nodded over to Pauline, who blushed as she got back to her secretarial duties. He continued to stare at her until he felt two bodies sit down next to him.

"Hey, Alan, Eric."

"Ronald." They both acknowledged, before Alan continued, "Which secretary are you staring at now?"

"Only the love of my life." They both looked at him suspiciously, "Well, at least for this week. Her name is Pauline."

Alan nodded while Eric said, "Oh, I remember her. Didn't she go on a group date with us?" Alan turned to him shocked and he quickly followed up with, "Before Alan came to the department?"

"Yeah," Ronald said, "She says she thinks I've really grown up since then. I'm more mature now." Alan and Eric snorted into their own coffee. "Hey, I can be mature if I want to. Speaking of which, I'll need the two of you to come with me tonight."

"What?" they said in unison.

"Look, the only way I could get her to come is if she could bring along a couple of her friends, so I said I would bring a couple of my own friends and we'd make a night of it."

"Ronald," Alan never really could get angry enough to actually yell at someone, but Ronald could tell he wanted to, "Neither Eric nor I are exactly available for dating."

"I know, that's why it's perfect!" Ronald smiled at them, "You two can say great things about me, be nice to the girls, and there's no chance you'll try and steal Pauline away from me."

They rolled their eyes. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." Eric said, but Ronald could see something in his eyes. Somewhere, deep within Eric was the shinigami Ronald was friends with before Alan came to the department. Oh, by day, Eric was the perfect shinigami, paperwork in on time, souls reaped in a proper manner, but by night, he was the center of the party. Well, him and Ronald. Eric would never say it, but his friends could tell he wanted to go with Ronald.

"That doesn't mean you won't go." Ronald reminded him.

Eric looked at Alan. Alan could see the same things Ronald could, so he shrugged and nodded. "What time is this thing?"

Ronald was about to answer when the three of them sharply turned their heads around at the sound of "Hello~" They saw there the infamous red shinigami, Grell Sutcliffe.

"Ronnie, Eric, Al," Grell greeted them as he sat down on Ronald's other side.

"Hi, Grell," Ronald and Eric said, not altogether pleased.

"What are you doing here, Mr. Sutcliffe?" Alan asked across Eric and Ronald. "I thought you were staying home today."

"How many times have I told you to call me Ms. Sutcliffe, Al," Grell said cheerfully, "Anyway, no, I was just visiting my Sebas-chan. I'm afraid if I don't remind him I exist, he might forget all about me." He sighed and gave them a look of fake despair.

"Does Will know?" Ronald asked.

"Well, I'm sure he will soon—"

"SUTCLIFFE!"

"I would take that as a yes." Eric said as he, Ronald and Alan tried to blend into the couch to avoid Will's wrath.

"Oh, there you are Will!" Grell got up with his arms stretched out to hug his boss "I was hoping to run into—Ugh!" Grell's greeting was cut short by a sharp jab to his stomach from Will's tree-trimmer.

Will towered over Grell. "How many times have I told you, Sutcliffe" Will spat his words into Grell's long red hair, "Not to ever go near that demon!"

"Oh, Will~" Grell recovered and put his hands on Will's shoulder, "You know how I love a cold man." It was no use. Will was enraged.

"Sutcliffe." Will spoke through his teeth. "You will be working overtime every night this week and you will go through EVERY piece of paperwork I put on your desk, or I swear you will be expelled from the Shinigami Dispatch!" Will turned to Eric, Alan, and Ronald. "And you three will be working overtime as well!"

"What'd we do?" Eric asked indignantly.

"None of your paperwork was filled out properly last month. You will redo it ALL!"

"Now wait a second!" Ronald asked in complete disbelief. He was about to give Will a piece of his mind, and tell him there was no way he would stay for overtime that evening. However, one look into Will's dagger eyes and he panicked. "In single form?" He asked timidly.

"Triplicate, Knox, so you better start soon." Will grabbed Grell by the hair and started dragging him away. "You are starting right now."

"Ooo, I love it when you play rough!" They heard Grell say as he was pulled through the door. Right before it closed they heard a high-pitched "Ow!"

"That damn red—"

"Eric!" Alan stopped him before he could really start swearing.

"I agree with Eric. If Grell just kept away from that demon and stopped making Will so damn jealous—" Ronald pushed his lawn mower harder than was really necessary.

"Wait," Alan said as they got up to walk to their offices, "Jealous?"

"Alan," Ronald rolled his eyes, "Don't you know anything?"

Eric glared at him, but turned back to Alan. "Will and Grell were together, a really, really long time ago. They broke up," he said, in response to Alan's shocked expression, "Well before I even joined the department, but the stories are legend. Anyway, Grell's been trying to bring them back together ever since, but Will won't have any of it. But…" Eric shook his head.

"It's obvious to anyone with proper glasses on his face that Will is still completely obsessed with him." Ronald said. "I mean why do you think he goes so easy on him when Grell screws up? If he was any other Shinigami, he'd have been out of here long ago. And why do you think Will only gets into one of his rages after Grell does something to make him jealous? You know, I wish the two of them WOULD just go at it. It be less of a pain—"

Ronald stopped in his tracks. Alan and Eric turned to face him, but he appeared to be staring into the distance as if he had just seen a ghost. "Ronald?" Alan asked.

"for us." Ronald finished. He looked at them excited "That's it!"

"What's it?"

"Our solution! Our solution to all our problems! Well, with Will and Grell anyway."

"Ronald," Alan frowned him, "What on earth are you talking about?"

Ronald pulled the both of them in close conspiratorially. He started talking in a low voice, "Will gets mad and does silly things like give us overtime when he's jealous, right?" they nodded, "So, all we have to do, is get them together! Will will be so happy, he'll probably buy us the champagne himself."

"Ronald, are you out of your damn mind?" Eric said.

"Really, it sounds rather ridiculous."

"Ridiculous? It's brilliant! We just have to get it done by 7:00. That's when our reservations are."

"You made reservations before asking us?" Alan asked.

"Don't mention it. Now, it's 10 to 9 now, so that gives us about 10 hours."

"Ronald!" Eric slapped him upside the head, "Can you hear yourself? You want to defy Will to try and salvage a centuries dead relationship in 10 hours just so you can maybe get a chance to score with a girl you'll probably not talk to for another hundred years?"

"I know, right?" Ronald grinned at him, "It's the best plan I've ever had. Now are you two in?"

"I don't know, Ronald." Alan said, "meddling in this just seems wrong. If they care about each other, they should find it out themselves."

"And meanwhile we miss our group date, now come on. You know I'm gonna do it anyways, so you two might as well help me and get out of work early."

They looked at each other and did that thing couples did when they 'silently communicated.'

"All right." Alan said.

Eric nodded. "You better be right about this, Knox." He said, then as Alan turned to leave he whispered so his lover couldn't hear. "And this better not backfire on us, or I'll make sure you pay for it."

"Don't worry," Ronald said, brushing him off and following Alan, "Everything's gonna work out. We can totally do this!"


	2. Plan B

** A/N: Our dear trio of Shinigamis, facing difficulty, try to use Alan's plan. Oh, and Ronald wants to kill people. Enjoy! I don't own anything.**

"We can't do this."

Ronald, Eric, and Alan had kicked out everyone else in their office so they could sit and plan alone. They were surrounded by bits of paper, full of crossed out words and crumpled on the ground. The piles of paper had slowly built up for half an hour.

"Ronald, maybe we should just get back to our work." Alan sounded more like he was asking a question than making a statement.

"No!" Ronald said, furiously pacing around the office. "No, I have a better idea. Instead of getting them together…" he picked his lawn mower up off the ground and smiled maniacally, "I'll just kill them both!"

"Whoa, Ronald, Hey! HEY! Put that thing down!" Eric shouted as he and Alan quickly covered their heads. Reluctantly, Ronald put down the lawn mower. Everyone took a deep breath before Eric continued, "I think we'll need a plan B, Ronald."

"Maybe we're thinking about this the wrong way." Alan said, frowning, "We keep trying to manipulate them, trick them into admitting their feelings for one another."

"Yeah. That's the point." Ronald said. Eric frowned at him.

"Well, maybe we should be more straightforward about it. After all, love is something that should grow naturally. If we try and yank it to grow more, it will only die. We need to have a simple talk about things. Try and bring out their emotions. Only then will they truly fall in love."

Eric's eyes were watering as they looked upon his darling Alan. Ronald was ready to barf. "Grow naturally, huh?" Ronald asked under his breath, "like a thorn?" He had thought he had said it too softly for either of them to hear, but a second later, Eric had punched him straight in the eye.

"All right, all right!" Ronald said, nursing his black eye, "We'll go with Alan's mushy gushy plan. But you two better come up with a plan C, or I kill them both!"

"Why are we starting with Grell? His emotions are already brought out."

Ronald, Eric, and Alan were sitting and watching Grell as he was crouched over his desk, a pile of paperwork in front of him. However, the paper stack did not seem to be going down from when Grell started.

"Mr. Sutcliffe displays only some of his emotions. He's probably lonely. He really misses Will, or else why would he be trying to get him back."

"Wouldn't it be better if we got him to admit these 'deep feelings' in front of Will?"

Alan shook his head. "First we get him to admit his feelings to himself. Then he'll be more willing to say something to Mr. Spears."

Eric nodded in understanding while Ronald shrugged. "Alright. Go on."

"What?" Alan asked.

"Your plan. You go for it."

Alan looked panicked but eventually started his way over to Grell.

"Hello, Ms. Sutcliffe, Senpai."

Grell looked up happily from his work. "Al, darling! You called me Ms. Instead of Mr.! I'm so pleased.

"You seem a little down, Senpai. Is anything wrong?"

Grell sighed. "Other than the fact I have to just sit here doing paper work? I'll be okay, Al."

"I just thought, you might be lonely."

Grell smiled, "Ah, that's sweet Al. Now I know why Eric likes you so much." Eric smiled on the other side of the wall. Ronald tried desperately not to make gagging noises.

"Where's Will Senpai?"

Ronald couldn't tell, but he thought he saw Grell's mouth twitch.

"Oh, I don't know. Probably off thinking up more paperwork for me to do."

"He really seemed mad today. I think something is bothering him."

Grell laughed. "I think it's just that stick up his ass is starting to itch."

Al smiled. "Maybe he's just feeling lonely too."

Grell looked up at him. "Will? Lonely?"

"Well, you know what they say. It's lonely at the top. He's probably even lonelier than you."

"I had never thought of that." Grell frowned in thought. Al gave a slight glance back at Ronald and Eric to show his pride. Ronald admitted to himself that he was impressed. "I think I'll go talk with him now!"

"Uh, Senpai, don't you think you should wait a while, think about your emotions?"

"Nonsense. If my Will is lonely, then I must be there for him!" And without another word, he got up from his desk, knocking his paperwork to the floor, and skipped past Ronald and Eric into Will's office.

"Well, that didn't exactly go as planned, but—" Alan said joining them, but Ronald interrupted,

"Quick! I wanna know what they say!"

The three of them chased after Grell and stood by the door listening in.

"Oh, Will, I heard you were lonely!"

"What are you dong here? Get back to work!"

"Will~ you know I can't focus on things like work when I'm worrying about you!"

"Grell, if you value your career at all, you will get OUT OF MY OFFICE!"

"You know…" there was a pause and the three other shinigamis leaned in closer to the door, "I'll always be there for you, if you ever get the urge—OW!"

Ronald, Eric, and Alan jumped back just in time for Grell to be pushed out the door in a rather undignified position, with Will's Death Scythe holding him at a distance.

Ronald frowned in anger. "Calm down, Ronald." Eric said to him, "I just thought of a plan C."


	3. Plan C

**A/N: Okay, so Ted and Antoin are shinigami OC's that my friends and I made up. You're welcome, guys! Thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing! I don't own anything. **

"No, I can't do it." This was the most ridiculous thing Ronald had done, and he had done some pretty ridiculous things.

"Oh, come on, it's a brilliant plan!" Eric was smiling evilly while Alan looked nervous.

"Uh-Eric-maybe Ronald's right, this could backfire horribly."

"Why doesn't he do it?" Ronald pointed at Alan.

"They'd never believe it if it were me or Alan." Eric said, still smiling, "We can't take any chances."

"Chances my ass." Ronald muttered. He gathered his paperwork together and prepared himself.

"Remember, stall until we give you the signal." Eric said, "Don't be nervous, or he'll figure out your up to something.

Ronald glared at him. "Remind me why I'm doing this again?"

Eric grinned. "Will is already jealous, so we need to get Grell jealous too. I know, if anybody even looked at Alan the wrong way—" He shook his head. Alan smiled and put his head on Eric's shoulder.

"Fine." Ronald took a deep breath and walked to Will's office.

"Hey, boss?" Ronald asked, leaving the door wide open.

"What do you want, Knox?"

"I had a question about my paperwork. You see," Ronald brought his papers in front of Will and leaned over the desk so their faces were level, "This person died because her husband pushed her too hard and she fell on a kitchen knife. So, would it be classified under murder or accident?"

"This is a dilemma I would expect academy students to be able to solve, Knox. It's her husband's fault therefore it is murder. Even the mortal police said so in their statement."

"Yes, but mortal police don't always get things right, and—" Ronald was cut off when outside, he heard Ted, give a giant sneeze. Eric had obviously just 'accidentally' released a cloud of pepper, causing the mustachiode shinigami to sneeze. He looked up, and Alan and Grell were walking towards Will's office. "Oh, sorry boss." Ronald 'dropped' his paper on the other side of the desk.

Will sighed as he leaned over to pick it up. "No, I got it." Ronald leaned over Will and pushing his boss out of his chair, where Ronald fell on top of him. "Sorry-Sorry, I—"

"You dirty cheat!" Grell and Alan reached the door and looked in horror at Ronald sprawled across William. "Will! Ronald! I trusted you!"

"This is not as it appears, Grell!" Will said, pushing Ronald so he rolled off of him. "We fell, that's all."

"Senpai," Ronald said, but Grell shuffled over, kicked Ronald in the face and left.

"Ow!" Ronald clutched his jaw where Grell had kicked him as he tried to get up. He looked towards the door, where a small crowd was gathering, including Eric, Alan, Ted, Antoine, and—

"Pauline!" Ronald said, "I-I can explain—I—"

"I-" Pauline stammered looking shocked, "I-just—came to—see you, but, umm," She swallowed, opened her mouth to say something, but simply left.

"Knox." Will said his name so harshly, it was as if he had thrown it at the younger Shinigami. "You have just earned yourself another week's worth of overtime. Unpaid!" Will went back to his desk and glared until the crowd scattered. Ronald left.

Eric and Alan were waiting for him back at the office. "I-" he stammered, pointing at Eric, "am gonna kill you!"

"We didn't see Pauline was there!" Alan pleaded, "It's not Eric's fault!"

"IT DIDN'T EVEN WORK!" Ronald screamed at them.

"Well, not perfectly, no." Eric said, "but soon, it will all work out. Did you see the way Will tried to defend himself to Grell? Soon, he'll go and apologize to Grell for making him think that Will would ever betray him."

"AND HOW SOON IS THAT? WE HAVE 7 HOURS TO MAKE OUR RESERVATION!"

Alan and Eric looked at each other. "Well, I guess we could speed it along."

"How?" Alan asked. "Honestly, Eric, I told you these things can't be rushed. And besides that, what makes you think Spears Senpai will apologize to Sutcliffe Senpai anyway?"

"'Cause I would if it were me."

"Oh, Eric, Spears Senpai doesn't work like you. He—Ronald? Why are you smiling?"

Ronald looked between Eric and Alan. "There's one sure way to speed up people's confessions."

**A/N: It occurs to me that Ronald is kind of acting crazy. I just wanted to assure people that there will be no real violence, as Ronald tends to exaggerate his plans. He has no intention of killing anyone (he just gets rather emotional).**


	4. Back to Plan A

**A/N: Last chapter! I can't believe it! I have to say, I really, really love this story. Hope you like it! I don't own them, as much as I'd like to.**

"This is a bad idea." Alan said.

"So was yours. And so was Eric's. You have a better idea, please share it." Ronald poured two cups of tea.

"No, Ronald, I'm with Alan on this one. This is just wrong."

Ronald frowned at them. "Fine. I don't need you for this. I'll do it myself."

"Ronald…"

"I'll pick you up for dinner at around 6:30-ish?"

Alan and Eric looked at each other again. That look was starting to get on Ronald's nerves. Without another word they left.

Ronald picked up the tray up and thought about where to go first. He decided on Will's office.

"Will?" Ronald asked.

"If you value your life, Knox, you will step away from the door."

Ignoring his orders, Ronald stepped in bearing the tea. "I just wanted to apologize for earlier. I thought I would bring you some tea. I know that won't erase what I've done, but I hope it'll make up for part of it."

Will nodded. Ronald placed the tea on his desk and backed away quickly. Will nodded again and Ronald turned to the door. "You still have unpaid overtime. I'd suggest you get to work on it."

Ronald nodded before walking out the door and picking up the tea cup he left outside. "One down, one to go." He walked to Grell's desk, but looked back for a moment just in time to see Will take a sip of his 'tea.'

"Grell Senpai?"

"If you value your life, Ronnie, you will step away from the door."

_They really are meant for each other_ he thought. "Will sent me to see you." He said nervously.

"Will?" Grell paused, but couldn't let himself look at Ronald. "What did he want?"

"He wanted me to give you this." Ronald put the tea cup on his desk.

"What's this?" Grell lifted the cup to find a note on the plate, "'Grell, I wanted to apologize properly, come to my office immediately, Love Will." He muttered the words just loud enough for Ronald to hear it, not that he needed to. He was just happy he had long ago mastered Will's handwriting.

Ronald watched tentatively as Grell took a sip of his tea while re-reading the note. "I need to go." Grell stood up suddenly and walked straight for Will's office, Ronald trailing behind him.

Will was clutching his head in his heads, and he did not seem to be completely 'with it.'

"Will?" Grell asked him, "Did you want to tell me something?"

"Whuh?" Will asked. "Grell? What're you doin' here?"

"You-"Grell suddenly clutched his own head and reached for the chair for support, "You—asked—me—your—note—"

"Note?" Will asked. Ronald clenched his jaw from behind the door. "Why—would—I—send you—a note?"

They didn't speak for a moment. "You know, Grell, " Will said, "I really hate your guts."

Ronald frowned.

"I hate you too, Will." Grell said, breathing heavily, "I really do."

"You know, the thing with Knox was an accident."

"I know."

"I hate that Knox."

"I do too."

"He's such a freak."

"And a pervert."

"You should talk."

"Whatever, the point is I hate him.

"Me too."

Ronald was boiling. He felt his fingers twitching on his lawnmower. "Sorry, Alan and Eric," he muttered, "I'm going back to plan A." and with a tug on his lawnmower cord, he stepped in to the office.

"Do you think Ronald can pull it off?" Alan asked as he and Eric tried to work through their paperwork.

"Nah, he'll probably just make it worse."

"Hey, guys?" Ted stuck his head into their office, "Have either of you guys seen Will or Grell?"

"No." Alan said.

"Have you checked their offices?" Eric asked.

"Yeah, but Grell's is empty, and Will's is barricaded."

Alan and Eric looked at each other. "Barricaded?" Alan asked, "what do you mean?"

"I mean someone has put something on the inside to keep people from opening the door. Then there was this noise coming from inside. I thought it was Ronald's lawn mower for a second, but why would he have his deathscythe on in Will's office?"

They gave a soft laugh and waited until Ted had left and made his way down the hall before the two of them took off for Will's office.

Alan knocked hard on the door. "Ronald, it's me and Eric. What's going on in there?"

"Alan?" They heard Ronald say from inside, "Eric? Thank death." There was a sound of a lawn mower being removed from the door. Ronald opened the door just enough to let the two of them in.

Will's papers were spread all over the office, and there was a broken tea cup on the floor. Will's and Grell's death scythe's were laying on the floor, but there was no sign of either Will or Grell.

"Ronald?" Eric asked, "What did you do?"

Ronald gave a nervous half-smile, but it disappeared instantly. "You know me. I acted on instinct. Well, anyway, I managed to give them the spiked tea, and I got them in the same room, but they weren't doing anything right. And—after everything today—I just kinda snapped, you know."

"Ronald," Alan sounded exasperated, "where are they now?"

Ronald nervously pointed to the closet that was barred with a chair. Alan sighed and tried to unblock the door, when Ronald stopped him. "Are you crazy? They'll kill me!"

"Well, we have to let them out!" Alan said.

Eric shook his head "What on earth were you THINKING, Ronald?"

"I wasn't!" He said defensively. "Honestly, I was just so mad, and once I realized what I did, I panicked and barricaded the door."

Alan made his way past Ronald and pushed the chair away. "What is that?" he asked and pressed his ear against the door.

"What?" Ronald and Eric pushed their own ears against the door.

"What IS that?" Eric echoed.

"Well, Eric, when two people love each other very, very much—"

"I can't believe it." Ronald breathed and creaked the door open slightly, and then slammed it closed again. "I don't believe it! I did it!"

"They're—" Eric's voice trailed off as he pointed at the door.

"Nah, just kissing, but-!" Ronald broke into a smile. "Do you know what this means?"

"It means," said Will stepping out of the closet (A/N: not meant to be a metaphor, just a coincidence), Grell clinging to him, "That you are in very big trouble."

"Our reservations should be under 'Knox'" Eric said, Alan on his arm. The host of the restaurant checked his list.

"Ah, yes, Knox, party of six."

"Two, actually." Alan said, "the others had to cancel.

"Five, actually." The two of them turned around and saw Ronald entering the restaurant, a blonde on one arm and a brunette on the other.

"Ronald!" Eric said, "I thought Will gave you overtime until the end of the century!"

Ronald shrugged. "Yeah, but I figured sneaking out one night wouldn't kill me. Besides, these girls were lonely."

"We don't know why Pauline canceled." The blonde said.

"But WE still wanted to go, so we came and found Ronald."

The girls giggled as they looked up at Ronald. A waiter began escorting them to their table. "Alan, Eric, this is Crystal and Sarah from the secretary department."

The other shinigami nodded at them as they all took their seats, Alan and Eric on one side, Ronald, Crystal and Sarah on the other. Ronald did most of the talking, Crystal and Sarah most of the giggling, and Alan and Eric most of the actual eating, although they had fun too.

"Hey, look at that." Alan pointed at the door. Everyone turned to look.

Will and Grell had just entered the restaurant, Will looking as stoic as ever, Grell practically jumping where he stood. Will spoke calmly with the host.

"Oh, shit!" Ronald said, hiding behind Crystal. Hiding put him practically in Crystal's lap, although she didn't seem to mind.

Ronald waited for Alan to give him the all-clear signal, when Will had moved to a part of the restaurant where he couldn't see the other shinigami's table.

Ronald got up as if nothing had happened and picked up a breadstick. "I give 'em two months.

"Two months?" Alan asked.

"But you're the one who set them up!" Eric said.

Ronald shrugged. "Well, if I need another excursion from work," he began feeding Sarah the breadstick, "I'll just set them up again.

Alan and Eric looked at each other again, and they each knew what the other was thinking.

_Count us out._

**Thank you so much for reading, and thanks to everyone who reviewed! **


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